Today I've reached the sudden epiphany that if things carry on the way they are right now, I'll probably be preparing for orientation 2014 with Gloria as my OGL.
But enough of that, instead of constantly whining about what could have been, maybe I gotta start paving my own path.
I have to admit that I was too blissfully indulged in my own utopia of dreams and whatnots during the past few weeks and had little time to entertain this jumbled mash of thoughts which is (honestly) quite morbid and pessimistic to my liking sometimes.
In retrospect, my past few weeks haven't been bad at all. Human relationships are actually not as hard as I thought, these neuro connections between individuals and the sophistication of human actions might actually finally start and seem to make sense again. Actions are not as hard to predict and understand now, comprehending such sophisticated patterns and workings have never been my specialty anyway.
It's quite funny how everything around me changed after my birthday like its a marker of what has been and the brighter future which I actually like much much more. Maybe I'm just slowly and surely trying to learn about myself again because I don't understand myself. I don't understand why some people think in some ways about me and my reactions are normally incomprehensible to even myself because I'm just that weird.
Changed my blog name because I don't want to keep having no clues.
Psychologically I have to start having clues and directions in my life, have a superficial yet assuring grip on reality and my control over my fate and life in general. Vague promises by myself to myself that I will have more control over my identity and who I am.
Indignant I might be about my current situation but that shall be my rocket fuel
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