Monday, March 25, 2013

City of bright lights


Across the dreary winter borders there once stood a brilliant city. The city had magnificent lights that shone with all the brilliance in the world, the colors of the lights were those of the window, and the whole city looked like a beautiful picture from a tainted window. Buildings were all ingeniously designed and crafted, with arches and natural colors resembling those of nature, and greenery lined the edges of the roads. Modern, yet traditional; mechanical, yet natural all the same; it was designed by humans, yet it matched the beauty of nature in every aspect. The “city of lights” as the people called it, it was beautiful, picturesque and perfect.
Citizens are always free to do what they want, the city is self sustaining – you don’t have to worry about food or electricity. The solar panels provided ample electricity for the city to run on as long as there is enough sunlight, and the machineries are able to self operate and cultivate food and engineered crops capable of feeding the entire city. Take a stroll along the city when you’re free, you’re never tired of the city lights. Or have a picnic at the parks where you can just sit down and appreciate the beauty of the nature and city combined. Everyone was always occupied with the various activities the city provided, be it playing games or working. We were contented, happy and free.
I was a modern man, I believed in technology, in the ability of human creation. To me, there was no god. To us, the inhabitants of this grand city, we were our own gods; there was no higher being other than ourselves. We are the engineers of the future; we are the creators of life; we are the grand deity which rules over the rest of the world. Life is no longer a creation of god, but merely a product of the incubation tanks. What god can do, we can do too.
So why fear god, when you can be god? Why do you believe in something that doesn’t exist, when you can believe in yourself, rely on yourself, and solve your own problems?
“Noah was a smart man that believed in god, the foolish were punished by god because they have started to believe nothing but themselves.” “The day the sky turns red means that the world will end”
Brilliant colors of the sky intrigue me, their bright blue shows me that world of open possibilities, and their tinge of orange signifies the end of the day. The darkness of the sky shows the end of the possibilities, the end of life. Lying back on the park bench, the sky was odd today – it was blood red, and the clouds were moving too fast. The sky seemed like a swirling whirlpool of blood, a grim reaper from the sky, a foreboding of death. Scary as it was, this apocalyptic foreboding was beautiful, yet dreadful at the same time, and I could only stop and marvel at this painting of nature.
This terrific beast of nature quickly grew, and this beautiful whirlpool of death converged and started forming into a hurricane, gradually taking the form of cone of wind. The ground also shook, and rain started to fall.
All of this was odd – the city of lights has been known to be impervious to all forms of natural disasters, and weathers were regulated within the city.
As I stood watching the formation of this mammoth of wind, the dread and horror began to form up within me, as I felt the ground tremor violently, and wind started pouring onto my head. Knowing nowhere to run to, I hid in a small cave that was a common dwelling for the park goers. From this cave, I saw this destruction of the city. I saw years of perfect engineering and architectural progress go down the drain, as every single building started to twist and turn into a convulsed manner, eventually breaking apart and being blown away by the wind. The ground also opened up, swallowing the vehicles along the streets. This was a disaster – the wind carried people off the ground, and the remaining ones were swallowed up by the openings in the ground. There was a pandemonium as people scrambled to safety, but few made it. Surprisingly, this natural cave has provided a good protection against the harms, and I survived through this string of disasters.
It wasn’t easy witnessing the grandest city to fall. The colorful lights of the city all turned grey, and the grand arches and green buildings all collapsed and broke down. As if submerged into a gigantic pit, the buildings started to fall one by one like a stack of dominoes, creating pillows of smoke as they go down. It was a saddening sight, it was a dark sight.
So where is god now? He was there; he was the one who caused this. He wanted to show us he exists, and that all of us were foolish to believe in ourselves. We were the ones who created our downfall.
It’s kind of sad, that the original brilliance of the city are now ruins beyond that winter plains. Surprisingly, this aboriginal village that I stay in now are god fearing and believing, and somehow they are happy with what they have.  



Saturday, March 23, 2013

Subjugation of the willing

Talking to you felt like talking to a wall.
I talk and talk and talk but I never get replies.
I decorate this wall, I praise this wall. But all of these efforts are unappreciated.

It's kinda sad that even though its like this. I still carried on doing it.

I look towards that love,
the cold stone wall you are,
You moan your replies

The past was a foolish representation of the present, of a fickle, idea driven impulse of the unknowing.

My heart has become numb from all the trying. It has become cold. Rock it has become.
And my sense dull, and my body turns rigid.
My eyes flicker, and my pupils dilute.
Strands of hair turns into wires,
and as if medusa induced , I have become a stone.

The once brownish eyes now black. The once flush red cheeks now gray.
Badly chiseled teeth are now stones.
The soul has left the body for the search of another one. A better one, a stronger one. One that is living.

Roaming about the planes of life.
I am now the wall you talk to



Thursday, March 21, 2013

Monochrome

Life is just a dull piece of picture. A monochrome one. A colorless one without any vibrancy.
It is dull.
It is dry.
It is dreadful.

What has life got to do with us? Why are we subjected to living this cruel, dull life.
Only love can dissolve this coldness, this numbness. But thats bullshit.
Love is fake.
Love is nonexistent.
It is ethereal.

It is a fabrication of the mind, it is the ghost of affection. Its not there, it will never be there.
Human interactions are superficial, they are calculating. And its getting tiring

Every single day you wake up to please others.
To please those around you.
Please your parents,
please your friends,
please everyone.

But did you please yourself? Or are you just a cold heartless, artless slave to the manacles of  society - chained and bound by these expectations? Zombified, heartless, you live to please.
Ironically, it is yourself that you will fail to please.

One day you'll find something to life maybe. One day you'll get past the disappointments, the sad hard truths.the lies, the masks. The layers of makeup they use to conceal their feelings.

But till that day.

Hang on

Saturday, March 16, 2013

Disgusting Love

Who ever said that love is beautiful?
Bullshit.
Its.
Freaking.
Bullshit.

Yeah sure, you get someone who loves you, someone whose universe revolves around you. Someone who follows you around, makes you happy. But it. is. not. beautiful.

It's troublesome, its irritating, it's time wasting.
It makes people distance themselves from other people, and it takes away the bros from the bro sect. It breaks up friendships because what happens is that the girl takes all the attention away.
And then these girls are jealous, they are volatile. They are demanding, they need attention.
So what do you do? You give the attention, you show them love.
At the end of the day, it's just draining your life slowly, bit by bit.

We're 16 going on 17, we're young and foolish. We are teenagers, we have the future infront of us. Why commit now? Contempt ourselves in satisfying our infatuation, but end up messing up our mind, our thoughts because of that ONE. SINGLE. GIRL?

Its disgusting. Its not beautiful. Its disgusting.

And the torment of attention will haunt you on and on. I would like myself to be with my friends, not be with a girl.
But who knows? Maybe I'll get a girl, maybe I'll go back on my words. But now, no. Maybe I'll find the "perfect" one, maybe I'll find the girl of my dreams. Who knows. I don't think its worth it though.

Not like I'll busy myself with chasing any girl. Its too troublesome, been there done that.

So to all you despo shits out there. Get a grip on yourself.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

The winter rose

As with all deaths, no one embraces them. No one relishes the thought of death, the unknown the darkness of the afterlife which no one knows about. What will happen to my family? What will happen to all those that love me? The attachments are what keeps us alive.

That chilly winter night still sends shivers down my spine. It reeked of death, of suffering. The pure white snow were just blankets over the darkness beneath them, it hid them, but they were there. That was the day the little child died, the grim reaper came silently, and left without a word. The child lost her life, but with that gained reprieve from the suffering of her illnesses.

I cried, as with all those that have faced death. But I shall not; no, I will no mourn. There is life left to live, there is a new dawn of era in the future. It is not bleak. Live on, love on, cherish on. Even if you lose what you have, be grateful that you had it in the first place

Sunday, March 3, 2013

Wonderstruck

Maybe its every single time I step into a class that I will hate them first. Like, I didn't like my class, I had no friends in it and I was. a. loner.
Then again somehow, somewhat, like 1A4, or 3A1, I am coming to love 13A11. Its the people that make it count, everyone is so buoyish and happy that they put a smile on my face many a times. But the sad thing is that this is a sad class, so many people are leaving, or might leave.
In my mind, I'm praying that they won't leave, that no one else will leave this wonderful class, and I hope they can stay. No matter what, its unbelievable at how these people are actually quite cool.
Coolness aside, its about time that I should be more serious in my life. Too long have I slacked, and the pressure is finally mounting. The A levels results have been exceedingly well again, and as a just above average student in this elite school, i cant help but feel the pressure.
What if I don't do well enough? The thought drives me nuts.
But no matter, I hope I'll strive hard , and get all the As I need.
This class has the right attitude, so maybe we can get our As together.
Jiayou